This is going to be one of those rare times I deviate from talking about Dalton and share an altogether different subject.  It was simply too good not to blog about… plus I truly believe there is a message in here that someone might need to hear.

 

It started about a month ago when our neighbor down at Grand Lake told us there was a woman he knew that had a restraining order against a guy who has no way to communicate to her except through making YouTube videos.  Well apparently he was trying to impress her by telling her he bought her a house, except that house he was using in the videos was our house.  He was making videos of the outside making it seem like he lived there.  My neighbor told me the guy’s last name but that was about it.  We have a very good security system down there and since I hadn’t seen any unusual activity, I decided to kind of blow it off as a “weird story.”  Weeks went by with nothing out of the ordinary so I didn’t ever think much of it.

 

Fast forward to last weekend and we have family down at our lakehouse for several days.  Saturday evening rolls around and we are discussing our dinner plans when there is a knock at the door.  Troy answers it and it is a gentleman who says he is interested in buying our house.  He gives Troy his name and tells him his wife is a neurosurgeon who is currently out of town for work.  He says they are new to Grove and have driven by our house numerous times and have fallen in love with it.  Even though our house is not for sale, Troy invites him in.  If you know my husband very well, you would know that most everything he has is for sale for the right price (this is me rolling my eyes).

 

The guy asks to see everything and Troy briefly gives him a tour.  Meanwhile, we are all getting a little impatient to get to dinner somewhere.  After the hurried tour, the gentleman says he would like to take a few pictures of the house to show his wife.  Troy says that is fine.  So while we are growing restless to eat, this guy is taking his sweet time.  He appears to be walking from room to room, inside and out, taking pictures using his Ipad. I can tell Troy is giving him some space and trying not to hover.  After he is through doing that, he casually wants to sit down with Troy and discuss a price.  I am starting to get some bizarre vibes so I decide to walk out to the driveway and take a picture of this man’s license tag just in case.

 

The two men finally wrap up their conversation and we all head out to eat a now very late supper.  Our family is extremely eager to hear what all that guy had to say so Troy filled everyone in on the details.  Apparently the guy said he wanted it all – the house, boats, jetski, furniture… you name it.  All he expected my husband to do was come up with a price.  It was all so weird and felt less believable by the minute.  Shortly before bed and knowing I had taken a picture of that guy’s license tag, Troy decided to pay for an online service to find out who the car was registered to.  And what do you know… it came back with the same last name that our neighbor said belonged to the man pretending to own our house.

 

It turns out you can find out a lot of public information on people if you search hard enough.  We were able to see the name of the woman who had the restraining order against him and decided to send her a facebook message to contact us at her earliest convenience.  That following morning she must have checked her messages and called immediately.  We explained what had happened the previous day and how we found her name.  She thanked us for calling her, apologized for us being involved in this mess, and gave us a short run down on her past relationship with the man.  Without giving too many details she shared that they had been broken up for a few months but he couldn’t get the hint that she was done with him.  I guess he wouldn’t leave her alone so she had to get a restraining order against him.  Then after being ordered not to contact her, he began making these wild YouTube videos where he would attempt to win her back.  He would talk to the camera as if he were talking directly to her and often lie about owning things that didn’t belong to him in an effort to impress her.

 

She asked if we had seen his latest videos.  We inquired about his YouTube channel name and looked him up.  That is when we saw them.  He had posted 6 or 7 videos of the inside of our home where he is walking around pretending that he is giving a tour to this woman he is obsessed with.  He has video of our entire home right down to the dirty clothes laying in the master closet that I had changed out of to go to dinner.  In these videos, he is claiming that he has “a bunch of friends over.”  Somehow he was able to film all of that while we were trying to wait as patient as we could on the back deck – which was the only place he didn’t walk out to.  There were literally 12 of us and no one ever realized what he had been doing.  It honestly appeared to us at the time that he was taking a few photos to presumably send to his wife the “neurosurgeon.”  In these videos, he would talk to this woman and tell her things like, “I knew you wouldn’t believe me, so I had to make these videos to show you what all I have bought for you.  I love you so much.  Come back to me and this all will be yours too.”

 

Uh yeah.  So things have taken a disturbing turn.  We get off the phone with her and Troy quietly asks me if I want to take a walk with him so we can talk.  This was when I knew I was dealing with a different Troy from whom he once was.  The Troy from ten years ago would have been ready to settle this with fists.  Then cops.  Actually maybe fists and cops.  Anyway, I could tell he was processing.  During our walk, he looked at me and said, “I really would prefer we don’t make an enemy out of this guy.  We know nothing about him other than he obviously has a terrible obsession for a woman and likely some sort of mental issue going on.  I don’t want to be scared that he might do something stupid to you guys so I would really prefer to just tell him the gig is up.”  I think about that moment now and wonder how big my eyes must have gotten.  I started to protest and stopped.  I shut my mouth and decided I was simply going to trust that he knew what he was doing.

 

We walked into the house and told the family what we were going to do.  Everyone there had been briefed earlier about what was going on so to say the vibe in the home was uneasy is an understatement.  Our family stood surrounding Troy in the living room as he dialed that guy’s phone number, anxious to hear how this would all play out.  He answered.  Troy told him we knew everything and he needed to stop what he was doing.  That guy ended up not denying a single thing.  He knew he was caught and started apologizing right away.  He went on to give Troy the low-down on the woman he was desperately trying to win back and all the measures he has taken in order to do that.  We watched in amazement as Troy hung on the line letting this stranger go on and on and on.  Casually (and a little comically) we listened as Troy did his best to offer up relationship counseling.  Time went on and he asked Troy if he could come by to apologize to the entire family.  Not all the family members had quite been won over by his repentant, heartfelt story and weren’t exactly comfortable with that.  Sensing that this man truly needed to apologize in person, Troy took his dad and they agreed to meet him in a public place.  Nearly two hours went by.  Two hours Troy drank coffee and listened to this man who just hours earlier had totally duped us talk and talk.  Later I asked what the heck they could have talked about for that long and Troy said he mainly just listened.  He listened to a person who probably hadn’t had someone take that kind of time out for him in years.  Then this guy asked if Troy would appear in one of his videos so he could come clean to the woman he is clearly obsessed with so she might see him as wanting to lead an honest life after all.  Interestingly enough, Troy agreed.

 

We could debate for hours about whether or not we did the “right” thing considering the circumstances.  All I know is I have had almost a week to process what happened and every day I have told this story to someone new and grown prouder and prouder of my husband.  He showed mercy and grace to someone who clearly did not deserve it, all the while maintaining an almost foreign type of calmness under pressure.  Since last weekend, Troy has shared some messages from Pastor Mark at New Spring Church and their current online series, ironically called Restart, with this guy. They have also engaged over the phone in some great conversations about God and getting a second chance in life.  They have discussed how he needs to change his focus off this woman and to start finding a purpose for his life.  Neither Troy or I ever got the impression that guy would hurt anyone, but he does show some tendencies to get pretty down on himself.  Troy even has talked to him about that.  The guy did go on to make a few more YouTubes videos before taking them all down for good where he talks a lot about his new friend he made named Troy lol.  I watched them and they seemed very genuine.

 

I am reading a book for my small group bible study called The Relationship Principles of Jesus.  Chapter 38 is called “Love Your Enemies.” The author is citing a great passage of scripture from Luke.  “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you?  Even sinners love those who love them.  And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you?  Even ‘sinners’ do that.  And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you?  Even ‘sinners’ lend to ‘sinners,’ expecting to be repaid in full.  But love your enemies, do good to them.”  ( Luke 6:32-35)  Also in that same chapter of this book, the author states, “Jesus is showing us that we have a relationship even with an enemy.  He teaches us that the only way to win over our enemy is by doing good – and it’s the only way to keep our spiritual dignity in a difficult situation as well.  Instead of allowing our enemy to take our rights away, we choose to give to them.”  After reading that I wondered what is so wrong about loving a stranger and wanting to help someone who is still a sinner?  After all, isn’t that what Jesus did for all of us? Jesus died while we were all still sinners, rejecting God’s plan for us so we could  live our own selfish lives.

 

Sorry this got so lengthy.  But it likely had to for you to see the full picture.  We can’t predict the future, but we can feel good about how it might turn out.  Because of my husband’s willingness to extend mercy and forgiveness, maybe just maybe, the cycle of hurt in this man’s life can be broken.  Perhaps this guy sees that there are so many better things in life to experience.  This is reaching deep here… but maybe one day he will understand the undeserving gift God has to offer him of eternal life, much like the undeserving gift of friendship he has received from my husband after he went through great lengths to deceive our family.

 

I like to think we all have a highlight reel playing as we stand before God seated at his great white throne in heaven one day.  I say this because I’m absolutely certain this act of kindness is going to be on that reel.  Maybe God walks up to Troy and asks him to start quoting scripture.  Looking downcast, Troy replies, “I never got to where I could memorize a bunch of that stuff.”  Then God smiles, pats him gently on the shoulder and says, “It’s ok.  I’ve got something better than learning all the verses in the bible.  Look up here (as he points to the highlight reel).  Do you see you?  Now, I sure know you love me.  But, here.  Here is where you live out the commandment I have ordered you to do.  You have treated that man there (your neighbor) with the love and respect I commanded you to do.  Well done, my good and faithful servant.

 

If that moment should happen and quite honestly I don’t see how it wouldn’t now after watching in awe as the whole thing played out in real time, I sure hope they allow at least one spectator for the highlight reel presentation.  Because there will be a 13 year boy watching who is going to be proud as heck of his dad.  He will probably saunter over to him afterwards and say, “Wow dad, I didn’t know you had it in you… but I’m sure glad you did.  Now can you come be catcher so I can throw to you?”